a wise girl...

a wise girl kisses but doesnt love, listens but doesnt believe, and leaves before she is left.

The Climb

"I can almost see it
That dream I'm dreaming but
There's a voice inside my head sayin,
You'll never reach it,
Every step I'm taking,
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking but I
Got to keep trying
Got to keep my head held high

There's always going to be another mountain
I'm always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes I'm gonna to have to lose,
Ain't about how fast I get there,
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing,
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down but
No I'm not breaking
I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I'm going to remember most yeah
Just got to keep going
And I, I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on, cause

There's always going to be another mountain
I'm always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes I'm gonna to have to lose,
Ain't about how fast I get there,
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb (yeah)

There's always going to be another mountain
I'm always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes you going to have to lose,
Ain't about how fast I get there,
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb (yeah yeah ea ea)

Keep on moving
Keep climbing
Keep the faith babyI

t's all about
It's all about
The climb

Keep the faith
Keep your faith"

I wish I had some faith in myself... I wish I could get past the first 4 lines of the song applying to me. I feel like utter shit and I've been alone all day.

I NEED CHOCOLATE!!

self diagnosis

I've decided that against all will and for no apparent reason I've slipped ever so slowly into a course of depression. Not the emo-I'm-going-to-kill-myself-because-I-hate-the-world depression, the depression that creeps in during the night that makes you realise that you're alone in the world and feel like no one will ever keep you warm at night. Your bed will be empty and stay empty.
And when do you do when, against all historical records of yourself, you realise, yet again, that the person you swore would never obtain your heart for the fifth, sixth or seventh time, obtains your heart, with no intention of letting you steal theirs?
Why do people pretend to be other people's friends? She's vulgar and rude and uses people. Well your 'best friend' has other best friends too! When I'm around ae you really insecure enough to literally hold on and not let go? And I swear if that mother turns up to my Schoolies she will never hear the end of it. Trust me on that.
Well its 35 days until I can legally drown my sorrows, and 36 until I can drive 10km/h faster. Shouldn't that help brighten my smile?
And shouldn't the support of people I know in following my dreams and looking for the future brighten my outlook on life? Why is this not so?
Why is it that the only time I can truly smile is when I'm around some of the people that enforce the sadness?